Wednesday, 8 January 2025

Cunning vs Wisdom in Relationships

 


Relationships are the cornerstone of human existence, influencing our personal and professional lives. The way we manage these relationships can determine their success or failure. This article explores two distinct approaches—cunning and wisdom—and their profound impact on the dynamics of relationships.

 The Nature of Relationships

The life of every man or woman is made up of myriads of relationships: relationships with family, business partners, associates, colleagues, friends, religious brethren and leaders, neighbours, and members of the community. Truth be told, humans are social creatures and cannot survive in isolation. Relationships are vital to the very essence of our existence, and thus, the importance placed on how we manage them cannot be overstated.

 Defining Cunning and Wisdom

Cunning can be described as the use of deceit or manipulation to achieve one’s goals, often at the expense of others. It involves a calculated effort to outsmart or gain an advantage, regardless of the impact on the relationship.

Wisdom, on the other hand, is the ability to make sound judgments and decisions, rooted in experience, knowledge, and empathy. It seeks to achieve a balance that benefits all parties involved, fostering mutual respect and trust.

 Contrasting Cunning and Wisdom

Applying wisdom to a relationship is akin to using the right engine oil for a car’s engine, even if it’s more expensive. It ensures the engine runs smoothly and lasts longer. In contrast, applying cunning is like using a cheaper, unsuitable alternative to save costs. While it might seem beneficial in the short term, the long-term consequences are often disastrous.

 The Consequences of Cunning

Cunning usually leaves one party feeling cheated and the other party feeling smart. However, this false sense of satisfaction is fleeting, as it often leads to distrust, bad blood, and strained relationships. Over time, these negative emotions can spiral into enmity, hatred, and even conflict.

The Fruits of Wisdom

Wisdom, on the other hand, seeks to find a middle ground that accommodates the wishes of all parties to a large extent. It fosters goodwill, camaraderie, and trust. In any given transaction or interaction, wisdom leaves both parties with a sense of satisfaction and strengthens the relationship over time.

Practical Examples

Consider a workplace scenario where two colleagues must collaborate on a project. A cunning approach might involve one colleague taking credit for the other's work to appear more competent. While this may provide short-term recognition, it will likely damage trust and teamwork in the long run. In contrast, a wise approach would involve open communication, equitable division of tasks, and mutual acknowledgment of contributions, creating a productive and harmonious working relationship.

Scriptural Insights

The Bible teaches us that wisdom comes from God. Proverbs 2:6 states, "For the Lord gives wisdom; from His mouth come knowledge and understanding." Similarly, James 1:5 encourages, "If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him."

In contrast, cunning is often associated with deceit and manipulation. 2 Corinthians 11:3 warns, "But I fear, lest by any means, as the serpent beguiled Eve through his subtilty, so your minds should be corrupted from the simplicity that is in Christ."

Emotional Impact

Cunning leaves a burden on the heart. The constant need to analyze and psychoanalyze others creates paranoia, leading to strained relationships and isolation. True peace and growth come not from manipulation but from sincerity, openness, and mutual respect. Wisdom, on the other hand, provides inner peace, satisfaction, and a sense of well-being.

Conclusion

In every relationship, we face a choice: to act with wisdom or cunning. By choosing wisdom, we build lasting trust and goodwill. Let us strive to seek wisdom in our interactions, building relationships that stand the test of time. As the scripture reminds us, wisdom is a gift from God, freely given to those who ask. May we apply it generously in all our dealings, ensuring that our relationships remain strong, healthy, and fulfilling.

image gotten from: https://www.azquotes.com/quote/670377


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